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Thursday, March 27, 2008

Opinion: Changing seasons reveal the passing of time

posted by BOFarrell at 1h51

Although it seems as though the sun and moon are conspiring to keep us wintering a little longer, brief breaths of spring’s sweet song are beating our way. This song might be harmonious for most. However, for others, who perhaps haven’t weathered the year as well, it might not signal the best of times.
Rather, it might be merely a reminder of how fast time flies.
I witnessed an elderly woman slip on the sidewalk of Morgan Rd. recently. She found herself sprawled awkwardly and helplessly in a driveway of someone who was not home. She rose from this fall, but did not do so on her own. And this failure to rise visibly shook her, as it did me.
Like most days, this dignified individual had gone out for her walk around the neighbourhood. Heading back home, her routine shifted as she slipped on melting ice. Thus, she found herself at the mercy of strangers.
I was not the only one to stop and offer her help. No less than three cars stopped. Had her fall taken place along a quieter street, she might have found herself in an even more precarious position. And even more alone.
I offered to drive her home.
It turns out the woman had been on her regular walk that would take her from her seniors’ home, to her old home on Lakeshore Rd., and then back.
I helped her out of the car and into the nursing home residence. It felt good to come to the aid of someone in distress; however, I was worried that that the spring in this proud woman’s step had been permanently knocked out of her by this fall.
Worse still, I wondered if she even had someone to tell her story to.
sss
The closing scene from the movie Driving Miss Daisy echoes in my head.
In this final scene, the two main characters, now admittedly best friends, Miss Daisy (Jessica Tandy) and her driver, Hoke Colburn (Morgan Freeman), find themselves alone at a table of her nursing home. Hoke has come to visit, like he does from time to time.
For the first time, Miss Daisy turns to her visitor and says: “How are you, Hoke?”
“I’m doing the best I can,” replies Hoke with his poignant little wheezing laugh.
“Me too,” returns Daisy.
Hoke then says conclusively: “I reckon that’s about all there is to it, ain’t it?” To which they both smile, and breathe in their situation together.
Hoke then notices the pie directly in front of them and says; “Ooh, looky-here; you didn’t eat your Thanksgiving pie.”
Daisy attempts to manipulate her fork, but struggles. Hoke quietly takes it in his hand and says, “Here, let me help you.” After a few aided mouthfuls, the credits roll on the two of them together.
sss
The changing seasons may not be so wonderful when “doing the best we can” means that we can no longer rise from a tumble by ourselves. Or manipulate a fork.
One of my students recently questioned the value of spending some time with his grandmother “just playing cards.” He felt peculiar and slightly useless because while playing cards they barely spoke to each other.
I told him that those moments were important.
This spring, as the sunshine finally clears our sidewalks making them safer to trod, re-think how important your role can be with your aging relatives and friends.
In just a few simple moments you’ll be extending your hand before the fall. And I reckon that this is about all there is to it.
Huntley Addie teaches various things at John Rennie High School.