• In the Garden

Monday, October 6, 2008

Almanac squashes myth that there's no cure for a bore

posted by Terry OShaughnessy at 17h38

I like the Farmer’s Almanac. The language is direct and to the point, and even a bit bossy. Maybe it’s a leftover effect of having been to a strict Catholic school called Immaculata, but I seem to need that slightly scolding tone to get me going when I’m in my garden where there is always too much to do.

Like the nuns who taught me, the famous Almanac has a “Jobs To Do for This Month” list that I never fail to read without feeling an immediate need to obey.

For September, they urged us to check our coniferous trees, and told readers how to cope with branch tips that have been damaged or otherwise “mutilated by borers.” For those of us tired of the damage that borers can inflict, and who have been working on the perfect getaway line or blank look to hide one’s boredom behind, the Almanac’s advice would seem redundant, I suppose. But I feel you can never know enough about avoiding the mutilation that borers can inflict.

For October, the Almanac advises us to give our stored apples a change of air. And I wholeheartedly agree. It worked for Victorian ladies suffering from the vapours and other unspecified ailments (possibly too much patience with borers), and it will no doubt work for our new cache of autumn apples as well.

Finally, the Almanac advises us to store our squashes under our beds. I can only imagine that one would do this in strict privacy only, not wanting to be caught carrying gourds to bed. But there is more. The Almanac advises us to do so ONLY if our bedrooms are “coolish,” and not too warm. What the nuns of Immaculata would have to say about this, I can’t quite imagine. But if the Farmer’s Almanac says to do it, it must be the right thing to do.